Category Archives: bars

Mar
11
2010

Vegas usually annoys the piss out of me …

… seriously. It’s full of cheeseball douchebag wanna-be brainless fashion victims. It annoys me so much that normally I go windmill tilting and try to annoy it right back, but that has generally ended badly — like, my-friend-covered-in-a-third-party’s-blood badly — so I thought, okay, this time I’m going to play nice …
.. [...]

By zoobroker | Also posted in girls, nevada, slapped | Tagged , | Comments (0)
Mar
22
2009

Atoms Rearranged at Rontoms in Portland

We switched streams to another bar, called Rontoms, where Phaux immediately engaged with Matt Brown and discovered Matt’s passion for music as ACTUAL indie music label owner. 

While Phaux was having a conversation of actual substance, I was pointing at this girl’s cleavage.

Not sure what this is all about.  I think I thought her nose was [...]

By Phauxtog | Also posted in girls, oregon | Tagged , , | Comments (0)
Mar
21
2009

The universe exploded at the Doug Fir in Portland, OR

If you read wikipedia as much as I do, you’ll know that the tallest tree ever to exist was not a Giant Sequoia, but rather a Douglas-Fir.   After dinner, Phaux pointed us towards this arboronymous bar, in the Jupiter Hotel, which is also a semi-legendary music venue.  

Shortly after arriving, three blondes from Seattle [...]

By zoobroker | Also posted in fashion, girls, hotels, on the road, oregon, slapped | Tagged , , | Comments (1)
Mar
19
2009

Day 6: When You Least Expect It …

It looked like it was going to be a quiet night for us, with most of Banff trying to deal with their St. Patty’s Day hangovers. We headed to the Rose and Crown for a pint and some billiards …
The we met Little and Big John, a Scot and an Englishman, respectively, who both [...]

By Phauxtog | Also posted in canada, girls | Tagged , | Comments (0)
Mar
18
2009

Day 5: Banff Nightlife … Penetration Achieved

When I lived in Banff in 2000, I came to love this place like almost no other place on earth. I remember crying when I left that spring for the last time. Part of it was the girl (Yes, Kaylee, you), part of it was the house (Gus, Guy, Christie, Eric, Krissy, Jane, [...]

By zoobroker | Also posted in canada, girls, nightlife, slapped | Tagged | Comments (0)
Mar
13
2009

Day 0 - in and down

After a long flight from Newark (flawless), I landed, picked up my rental car without speaking to a human (way cool) and drove up into the city, where Zoo was already partying for hours (dick). Alas, the 5 was blocked, so I had to take my first “side road” and ended up driving up the west side [...]

By Phauxtog | Also posted in girls, nightlife | Tagged | Comments (1)
Mar
13
2009

Day 0: Bar Roundup

Before Phauxtog arrived, I ended up walking around Downtown and Belltown and checked out a few bars …
The Tap Room: 160 beers on tap, heavily skewed towards North America. This is not a place to go to pick up women, but an okay place to catch a game. Had some popcorn shrimp, [...]

By zoobroker | Also posted in washington | Tagged | Comments (0)
Mar
12
2009

1 down, 159 to go …

Lots of beer, no women. The Tap House, downtow Seattle. Pass one round …

By zoobroker | Also posted in from the road | Tagged , | Comments (0)
Oct
22
2008

Road Trip Worthy: Big Jake’s Cattle Company, Van Buren, AR

This might not even be the best steak around Fort Smith, Arkansas, but this place is the perfect place to grab a bite and a beer after a long drive.   Years ago, I left a piece of my heart here … nuff said.
Also check out the Electric Cowboy.  It might be the best bar in [...]

By zoobroker | Also posted in arkansas, food, girls | Tagged | Comments (0)
Oct
06
2008

500 pushups!

You may have caught some moments on the timelapse video where I appear to be humping the ground … if you look carefully, my pants are actually on.  I was attempting to do 50 pushups a day before going out drinking.  Mostly, I did a good job of that, but a couple nights I forgot [...]

By zoobroker | Also posted in Zoobroker, fashion, milestones | Tagged , , | Comments (0)